ENJOY THE FREE AND OPEN LIFE

We all have standards. We set standards for others and standards for ourselves. What do our personal rules of conduct or behavior do for us? The upside is we establish guidelines for our own lives. The downside is that we feel we are empowered to decide what is right, what is wrong, what is good, what is bad. There is only black and white, no gray. We narrow our options. Our unyielding decisions lead us to ongoing patterns of judgment.

Not all judgment is wrong. Judgment as simple analysis is necessary. We owe it to ourselves and our comfort to avoid someone who continually causes us emotional or physical pain. We don’t need to stay in a relationship that is pulling all of our energy. Yet, labeling that person “bad” is not good for us. That labeling when taken to the extreme can form an ongoing grudge and physical discomfort.


Labeling any person or situation as being in some way “unacceptable” creates separation. It fosters fear. It is equally hurtful when we tell ourselves that we are wrong and deserve to suffer blame. To live the free and open life we need to understand that anyone, including each one of us, does what appears to be the best or right thing to do. Looking from our personal point of view, that is often hard to realize.

At any moment in time each of us does what we believe will “fix” the problem. We may act too quickly. We may not seem things clearly. Nevertheless, each of us does exactly what he believes is going to set his little world right. That one action, when analyzed later, may not have “fixed” anything and may have caused harm to ourselves and others.

How can we live freely and openly if we believe we need to keep judging? To allow everyone, including you, to learn their lessons in their own unique and individual way, is the best. After all, the truth is that our world is not made up of “us” right here and “them” over there. In fact, we are all closely connected. All of “them” are just “us”. When we judge one person, those vibrations of fear and condemnation cause an unpleasant energy ripple in all of us.

Out of habit, we probably will continue to see someone or something we don’t approve and we will label. It’s not an easy habit to break. Until we can apply unconditional love for ourselves and others, perhaps until we believe in that possibility, we will need to exercise forgiveness. Forgiveness would be absolutely unnecessary, if we were not sitting in judgment.

Holding tightly to hurt, whether created by ourselves or others, is much more than just an emotional or mental challenge. Let’s not condemn ourselves or anyone for the acts or experiences that we call error. Holding hurts in our hearts, causes very real discomfort and pain in our bodies.

Keeping a grudge for months and years, can manifest as unpleasant, or even deadly, disease in our physical. Forgive for your own sake. Embrace the now moment and the future. Forgive everyone and anything to allow healing to begin in all aspects of your life.

In order to see the broader picture, all sides of any situation, we must lay judgment aside. The need to judge can blind us to infinite possibilities. It is difficult to set things “right” if all we can see is “wrong”. Happiness is available through an openness of mind and an allowing.

It may help to remember that the past is just the past. Whether the event happened five minutes ago or five years ago, it is still the past! The past cannot touch you, unless your memory keeps it close, thereby giving it ongoing life and energy. Instead, decide to give your love and understanding today wherever you see a need. This act alone can push back any seeming limits to your growth producing experiences. Your ongoing expression of love and appreciation to yourself and to others will dynamically light your life path.

I am always ready to help you with any life challenge or question. I will address thoughts from your loved ones who have passed. I can assist with dream interpretation. Your personal angels and guides are waiting to be asked. For a private spirit-filled counseling session, call me, Reverend Lois. Your psychic reading appointment is waiting. (479) 657-6491, Bella Vista, Arkansas.